absconditus

ok.

my heart is set, my mind is not. the fact that my family and friends do not support whatever decision i make is so frustrating i want to scream.

i know what has happened. i know because it happened to me, not you. and this decision is mine, not yours.

there are still questions i need answers to.

• what will stop you from doing it again?
• do you love me enough to get over this fear?
• is this revelation enough?
• will you love me?

i need promises that you will not do the same thing again. promises that you will put everything forth that a relationship needs: love, support, laughter, friendship, trust, honesty, kindness, happiness. can you do that?

i don’t know if this wil be enough. i have no idea. why couldn’t this clarity happen months ago?

and furthermore, i am going to be furious if my friends don’t shut the hell up and listen to ME. it is my decision and as my friend, you need to support that decision or i will have no other choice but to discontinue confiding in you. i know what your feelings are and understand them; however, i know exactly what has happened and you have only seen glimpses. you do not know all. please stop talking and start listening.

if this is a new year, why can’t we have new perspective?